153- Resolve and reality
I resist the urge to hide my face in the pillows, and I suspect Bellamy knows, because he just grins even harder and leans in to k*ss me lightly on the nose. In an attempt to avoid my embarrassment, or maybe just to pretend it doesn’t exist, I cast around for another subject, any subject other than… foreplay.
“You know, I really needed the night out tonight. Thanks for helping make it happen without complaining. Or at least with minimal fuss. I really needed the distraction. And thanks for putting up with Harry, I swear he grows on you.” I promise. Still feeling awkward, I sit up to avoid Bellamy’s gaze and flick off the lamp leaving us in complete darkness before laying back down, still facing Bellamy. I don’t want to see anything, somehow things are less embarrassing in the dark. I can’t see a thing in this blackness, but he can, and I want him to be able to see my face and understand that I mean it. I really do appreciate his attempts to accept Harry. Incubi don’t tend to make a lot of friends and while it is often their own fault, it also leads to a lot of stereotypes that make life a lot harder for them if they actually do want to make close friends, or have an actual romantic relationship. Not that romance is usually at the top of their minds, but I’ve always known there would be someone out there for Harry, even before seeing his threads. He’s more loyal than most people, Incubus or not. I hope Cam is as awesome as I think she is because she is going to have to deal with a lot of judgemental. people. Everyone wants to sleep with an Incubus or Succubus, but in general, prudish people seem to believe that ‘respectable‘ people don’t date them. Bellamy sighs.
“You don’t have to thank me for any of that. You should be able to go out to dinner with friends whenever you want. I wish I could always give you what you want. Maybe when this is all over I’ll be able to give you what you want more often.” He sounds sad and frustrated.
“Yeah, but none of this is your fault. If it weren’t for you I’d probably have to lock myself in my home and never go outside. Actually to be honest if there really is someone out to get me, without you I would definitely be a goner by now.” I admit. I’m not sure that this is going to help my case for wanting to have independence, but Bellamy needs to know that I do appreciate his efforts to keep me safe. Even if I complain about it every now and then. He is
tense beside me.
“Don’t even talk about something bad happening to you. It won’t happen, I won’t allow it. Not now, not ever.” He growls out.
1/3
153- Resolve and reality
“Still. Thank you. Tonight was a nice distraction and I know you’re not fond of Harry so I appreciate that you did this for me.” I repeat. Bellamy’s hand lands on my hip.
“I don’t hate him exactly, I’m wary of him and a little jealous. It will help if he can make things work with that bartender girl. Hopefully it will mean he will stop flirting with you so much.” I giggle.
610
“I can’t promise that. Harry is Harry after all. I’m not sure he knows how else to behave. If you talk to him more he will probably start flirting with you too. It’s how he communicates. I promise you that he has no interest in me. None, zero, zilch. There have been entire conversations about how completely uninterested he is in me. Megan too if that helps any.” I throw in.
“It does a little actually. You’ve done so much to fit into my life. I want to accept your friends. too. I want to like them even. I’m going to do my best to give Harrison a chance and in the meantime, I might need a little extra… reassurance from you, until I learn to trust him. Or… maybe a few distractions.” With that last statement, his voice takes on a wicked edge.
“Oh?” I question. His hand moves from my hip down to my leg and back up again. I have a slight idea of what kind of distractions Bellamy is contemplating.
“I- I can do that. Probably.” I respond awkwardly. Bellamy chuckles.
“Speaking of distractions, come here.” He uses his hand on my leg to pull me in closer against him. His hand creeps around and lands on my ass.
“Bellamy!” I laugh and he just holds me firmly in place.
“Just sleep sweetheart. I’m not going to do anything, I just like holding you. It’s been a long day.” I’m about to object, but then I remember. One of his Shifters was killed. I’m not the only one who had a hard time. I decide to let him get away with it, this time.
“So compliant. I’m going to sleep well.” He mutters cheekily, but I can hear the sleep in his voice. He’s exhausted and practically asleep already.
“Goodnight.” I whisper and listen as his breathing evens out and slows until he is completely asleep. I might have objected a little, but I really don’t mind Bellamy’s hand on me like this.
2/3
Bellamy might have cooled down in the shower, but I did no such thing. Still, I know one thing for sure. I might still be scared and be holding back right now, but my b*dy and hormones are definitely one hundred percent on board with taking things further. It’s my mind that is struggling to catch up. I’m not even sure exactly what it is I’m waiting for.
When I eventually sleep, I am not surprised to see Kiara again. It’s not as traumatising as last. night’s nightmare, but it is heartbreaking. She sobs. All night. Occasionally she manages to fall asleep, only to jerk awake moments later, a scream on her face. She is clearly having nightmares. I mean, who wouldn’t. But each time she wakes up she looks a little more broken and then continues sobbing. Her big eyes are red and swollen with black shadows underneath. Her cheek is still badly bruised. Her hair is so tangled I’m not sure it can even be brushed out at this point and I can see the shadows of bruises on her arms too. I can’t imagine ever being forced to watch someone die, much less be killed. But I know that there is no way she is coming out of this without some serious emotional scars. I just hope I can find her before it’s too late for her to heal, if it isn’t already too late. But no, I just refuse to think like that. I’m going to find her, Bellamy is going
to help and we will find her. She will be a mess and is going to need a lot of care and love and I’m going to make sure she gets it. I don’t know what family she has left, but I’ll find them, and if I can’t… well, I don’t know. I’ll figure something out. I do my best to stay hopeful, I cling to my optimism and determination. But the longer I watch her cry, the more my heart breaks and the harder it is to convince myself that everything wi
will turn out well. I wake carly in the morning and I can feel wet tears on my cheeks. Not ready to face reality, I turn and hide my face in Bellamy’s chest. He isn’t awake, not really, but he still wraps his arms tightly around me and pulls me in close, murmuring some reassuring nonsense and doing his best to be comforting. Eventually, I fall asleep again, my mind too tired to do anything other than let everything finally fade into blackness.
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